Buckets of excrement!

JadeTotti Haziran 10, 2022

Hi gang!

Todays small post concerns a very amusing thing I noted when I was clipping out and glueing all the stuff from GW's The Hobbit: Escape from Goblin Town set.

The game in question. (Picture courtesy of Games Workshop.)

Since it might constitute a mild spoiler for the Hobbit movie premiering in about a week (I got tickets, yay!) I will put the rest behind the break. Click to find out more, if you dare!

There I was, happily clipping plastic, the smell of glue filling my head with grand visions of the amount of gaming I would be able to get in, when I noticed a very strange piece. I couldn't really figure out what it was for but I surmised it was for the Goblin King's throne.

The Goblin King's throne

The throne is quite large, to accomodate the Goblin King which is an immense figure. The throne is made of and old, presumably man-made, piece of wood carved with figures and shapes, lashed to a big rock. Some pillows and cushions are piled into a corner on the make-shift seat.

Hang on, what's that?

But there is a hole in the seat, right in the middle. And located just underneath the hole is a... bucket... of excrement? Yep, a big pile of hot stinking poo, but in plastic. The Goblin King's throne is also his toilet! Beside the bucket -- or barrel rather -- is a pile of bones and what I think is intestines. It's quite grisly and some of the excrements have spilled from the overflowing barrel. Holy crap (pun intended)!

Eeeewwwwww!!!

Now GW do have a dark sense of humour, but I think this is too much even for them to come up with by themselves. I suspect the fault is entirely Peter Jackson's who I know has a very twisted mind. One can only imagine the hapless sculptor looking at the concept art and slowly realising just what he has to sculpt... but wait, there's more!

The goblin scribe

Also included in the box set is a diminutive goblin perched on a swing of some sort, holding a quill and a paper. He's called the goblin scribe and I imagine serves as some kind of protocol droid, eh, goblin. The image of C-3PO and Jabba the hutt springs to mind, actually. The goblin's legs are shrunken and atrophied, as if he has spent most of his life sitting in that swing, or perhaps he's sitting in the swing because his legs are stunted? It doesn't matter, what matters is what is hanging under him. Yep, you guessed it, it's a bucket full of shit. And yes, there is a small hole in the bottom of the plank he's sitting on...